i'm trying to get it back
whatever it was i had that i didn't realise was lost until i noticed the different words people used to describe me
they say that sarcasm is the lowest form of wit but if used correctly it can still generate genuine laughter and mirth
people used to laugh at the things i said i did
as i've grown older i haven't become less sarcastic
in fact i'd say i've gotten more so
the issue as far as i can determine is that my sarcasm which was laced with cynicism has become cynicism laced with venom and sprinkled with a hint of sarcasm
robin williams starred in a film called jumanji which amongst other themes showed how all men become like their father unless they are strong enough to move past and become their own person
i recently noted the cynical nature of my own father and his tendancy towards negativity in the face of mild adversity
i have become a creature of habit and a reflection of my dad in many ways
everything i say or do is a replica or parody of something that i have said or done before
there are probably people in tesco who could tell you my entire shopping list and at what time on what days they would expect to see me
i used to think that on the wheel of life you could either be down in the mud or up the air and that even if you were stuck in a rut you still had the occasional time when things were looking up
whilst that may still hold true it is also true to say that if you let go of the wheel you will get left behind and in the rut or out of it all you will have is dirt
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