notice

i am now working my notice period in preparation for returning to university

leaving a job in the past for me has often been a big deal

people like me and they like the work that i do so they are generally sad to lose me and my awesome talents

in this case that emotion is still present but is somewhat dulled by the fact that there are six other employees leaving at the same time as me

so im just wrapping things up and trying not to leave any nasty surprises for whoever may take my place

maybe they'll get someone with some actual talent rather than just suave charm and cunning tenacity

made up stories

the ability to do a thing and the ability to teach another how to do the same thing are two seperate skills

many of the things i do have no logical process to their execution

i just do them and they work i cant tell you how what or why you just have to accept it

obviously in situations like this its difficult to apply culpability because you dont know what i did or did not do

so i make things up

i always have done and the few people that have realised it have told me that im pretty good at it because i say things that sound possible and therefore are accepted at face value

the truth is only what a person wants to hear

who is he

and why should i care

so this name keeps coming up in conversation recently

and the man himself has been coming to my place of work on more than once occasion

ive never seen some people work so hard

nor have i ever seen quite as much ass kissing

and i used to work for.. well, im not going to name names.. but there was a lot of ass kissing there

due to the complexity of the management structure here there are a number of people who can basically tell me what to do from day to day

for this reason i tell people that my boss is a hydra which usually gets a few laughs

im noticing now that each of the heads of my hydra have more than one face

and it irks me

patience

ive always been quite proud of my patience

my ability to not let things bother me and just wait for the right time has always been a strength of mine

a friend of mine said to me that he thought i had a handful of people in this world that i would do anything for and that i spent my life just waiting for them to need me to do something for them

im worried that he might have been right

outrageous

in an attempt to disrupt the crippling stagnation of my life i am trying to recreate a period of my life that nostalgia tells me was awesome

talk about setting yourself up for a fall

it got me to thinking about how i seem to have a habit of putting myself in situations where i expect or intend to fail even though i appear to be trying my best

its all about false positives i guess which is a mathematical theory that i am actually quite fond of

or maybe its the paradox part that i like

but i dye grass

my point was that i wonder if i should do something radical like buy a one-way ticket to japan and see what happens

or pack a bag grab my passport withdraw all my money and try to fall off the grid for a few months

i wish there was a strange island somewhere that would pull me in and teach me what really matters in life

even it was populated by polar bears and smoke monsters

woop woop

its the sound of da police

the gunman in cumbria was described as a normal friendly guy by his friends family and neighbours

after his rampage the papers branded him a maniac

if a person is a maniac they are a maniac and will always be such

a normal person who kills a number of other people is not a maniac he is a normal person who has done something out of the ordinary

something out of the ordinary would be called extraordinary though the normal modern interpretation of that word means that i doubt anyone could say what happened was extraordinary

obviously the death of someone you knew is always going to affect you

but its not possible for a person in this world to die without there being someone who knew them

it takes me back to my point of how some things are socially acceptable because they are considered normal and other things are outrageous to even contemplate

im not saying we should all go around and murder anyone we feel like but i think there has to be a little bit of perspective in these situations people

arbitrary

so i was called into a meeting this morning where i was told that on a specific day next week i was to make sure that certain hardware was functioning correctly because certain locations were to be used by external speakers at a training/conference day in our building

i bit my tongue to stop from saying that since my job is to ensure the continued operation of all hardware in the building every day of the week i could be almost certain that the specific sites requested would be functional not only on the date mentioned but also every date before and after it

i paid little attention to the talk of flipcharts and pens after my suggestion to use the interactive whiteboard software present in every room in the building to collate virtual flipcharts was shot down for being 'too risky' in the face of non-IT people

these things cost a minimum of £1500 each only to be used as very expensive projector screens - if they are lucky enough to be used for even that